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Are Singles Who Try Out Internet Dating Really Sad?
A few years ago I recall the looks my friend Sarah would get when she mentioned she'd been trying online dating sites. I must admit, at the time, I too thought she must be desperate. Couldn't she meet anyone in 'real' life? Didn't she ever talk to people at work or at parties?
I judged her actions and concluded that she must be either socially inept, or a bit weird. Of course, you know I wouldn't be writing about this if she had never met anyone...sure enough, she met a guy online, they fell in love, and now they're married.
Even one experience like this in your own group of friends can make you question your rushed judgments. So, could online dating prove to be a mainstream way of meeting people, or would it remain in the margins of society? Is it humiliating to look for people online?
Well, let's say you're busy all day at work (nobody eligible there), you go out a couple of times a week with your usual group of friends, and the rest of the time you're washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning your home (or more likely a combination of Facebook, TV and surfing the net); realistically, how many new 'dateable' people are you likely to meet?
Even if you met one new person a week, how many of them are likely to be a good match? One in a hundred? At that rate, it would take a couple of years to even meet someone that you feel really attracted to. Not bad, but, in the meantime, you've spent two years alone!
So, what if you want to speed up the process? You do the sensible thing and search a database of millions of people on a dating site. You use the Internet to keep in touch with your friends, and for buying things, so why not for dating also?
Is email less 'real' than talking? Be honest, which do you do more of these days? Be even more honest, aren't messages and emails preferable when you're feeling a little nervous or anxious?
Talking to a person you've never met before that you like the look of is hard! Actually, initiating a conversation is way easier online. No more nervous chat-up lines and stuttered introductions. You get to think carefully through what you say and ensure that you present yourself in the right way. You don't have to worry about blushing or sweating or your mouth going dry.
To summarize, a long time ago, online dating seemed to me to be an absolute non-option. Now, I'm convinced that it's certainly the best place to start. Let's say you communicate with just 10 new singles per week through online dating sites - even if only one of those turns out to be eligible, you've enhanced your chances of meeting someone by 1000% over the natural method I mentioned earlier! You can't argue with that!
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